Home, But Not Home

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From Tathiana:

Recently, God blessed us by giving us the opportunity to return to Brazil after living here in the US for two years. This trip was very important for us in this continued season of transition to the US - yes, we’re certainly still in transition.

The feeling of arriving in Brazil and hugging the people we love is a kind of joy that makes your chest almost explode. Our time in Belo Horizonte was full of happiness, laughter, and good food, just like any good Brazilian event. We were able to visit our old home and the school where the kids studied. We spent precious time with family and friends. The bonds we have there are so strong that even with the distance, it feels like nothing can break them, as if we remain connected by an invisible thread.

This trip made me realize how much I missed being myself – being 100% understood without having to second-guess my own words. I miss being known. I now empathize more with Jon, who lived for 21 years outside his cultural comfort zone.

Our goodbyes were hard, especially for Sara and me. During our last week in Brazil, Sara said that her life there was so good, and she didn’t understand why we had to move. She was very honest and said she felt angry with Jon and me for taking her away from the friends she loved. As hard as it was to hear, I believe this was a necessary step for her in our process of transition.

We returned to the US a little over two weeks ago, and I won’t lie – reentry has been hard. It hasn't helped that I got sick, and Isaac is being treated for pneumonia. I’ve been fighting not to believe lies about our move here. American life really does meet many of our needs, but it also brings greater financial and relational challenges. Since arriving in the US two years ago, we’ve seen God's provision through family, partners and even new supporters. However, we have continued to work hard to raise a salary that matches the cost of living here. We’re still looking to raise an additional $1,200 per month to reach 100% of our budget. Even with me working as a substitute teacher, it’s still been hard to find margin with all the costs of establishing a new life in a new land. This has often brought us stress and discouragement, and it’s easy to fall into the trap of comparison.

I recently read that there is no explanation or medicine to cure the pain of being separated from your home country. It’s the price you pay for living far away.

But Jesus, oh Jesus, He can walk with me through this valley. That is my hope.

People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own. If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them. - Hebrews 11:14-16